International Lesbian Visability Day

On any other day this would of course be a vitally important occasion but i feel that with the current political unrest both here and in other countries when it comes to LGBT rights then i think its even more important to write about it.Being homophobic and sticking to those beliefs doesn’t serve anyone well the homaphic individual, the gay person, the child learning about relationships in school. What homophobic people lack in my view is a decent education on the subject, knowledge is power is a phrase that springs to mind here! There is such a huge strain on the health organisations across the globe in dealing with patience who present with illnesses directly coming from stress and depression because of homophobic abuse, or fear of coming out therefore living totally miserable lives.Not to mention support needed by families who have gone through the tragic loss of a loved one due to suicide just because they are gay.Most people in my opinion who have a homophobic personality need just as much support in re educating themselves to the truths behind all the myths they have been fed which leads them to be homophobic in the first place. Im reminded here of the day i first came out to my own mother the very first thing she said to me after telling her was “you know you will gets aids dont you” This was a response purely based on the badly delivered tv advertisements campaign she had recently seen talking about the Aids epedemic in the 80’s.Non of her beliefs around gay men or lesbians was actually based on facts she had discovered for herself.sadly her reaction hurt me badly and i was forced to go reluctantly back into the closet until many years later once i had moved out of the family home and was living independently .It was when living independantly i began to attend events and that’s when I finally accepted my sexuality for myself and realised how important it was for me to be visable as a lesbian.When  i reflect on lots of famous people i grew up with who came out i had such a warm familier feeling towards them a kind of knowing sence. I had in my head that George Micheal was gay at the peak of Whams career. Over the next few years after living alone, and exploring the bigger picture i began to research gay history, the important figures in this and the political movements for gay rights which again made me realise how much suffering had happened and how far we had come in my own lifetime, this then gave me an even bigger sence of pride in being a lesbian. I was no longer in situations whereby my sexuality came into conversation and i was almost apologetic for telling people i was a lesbian to the point where i can recall a meeting at an arts event where i had to introduce myself and the work i do and i was very clear to point out i was a lesbian and i actually said thats who i am and if you dont like it…i dont care!. As a disabled person i have been on the receiving end of more bullying because of my disability than most most of you have had hot dinners so i have grown up knowing that i am very different to the average person on the street so actually the time it took me to accept for myself that i was gay wasnt all that long.I finally had `a terminology, a reason why i had certain thoughts and feelings growing up.I get exasperated by people who call being gay a life style choice like its the same as what hair colour you want, what clothes you wear and what you do for a living is all a choice, the colour of anyones skin, whether you are disabled at birth isn’t a life style choice, your born that way, lesbianism isn’t a fashion statement a way in with the in crowd its who i am. Women in general over the history of the world have had so many battles for equality we live still in such a male dominant society its as if women get forgotten about theres so much about our lives today which is still not justified, like equal pay and being stereotyped in the media. Yes i agree that being a lesbian is only one part of being a women but with everything we have faced and fought for to have an equal place in society and with dangerous and scary times ahead with political changes happening globally all our campaigning and sacrifices are at stake. Its a scary world we live in when the leader of the most influential nation on the planet publicly mocks a disabled person asking questions during an election campaign and who has absolutely no respect for women or people from the LGBT community . We need more widespread education we need more understanding and empathy and tolerance for all kinds of communities and we need more lesbian role models from all walks of life to get the message across that its ok to be a lesbian yes its a huge pat of our identity but its not the whole of a person and that we can do anything and be anything we want. I am proud of my difference as a disabled woman and i am proud to be a lesbian i am not angry with anyone who may be homophobic rather i feel sad they have not had an opportunity to re educate themselves against the untruths they have picked up in their lives so far. I am here to stay i am a women and i am a lesbian and proud of everything i am and what i stand for.IMG_0341

Ive definately got a spring in my step

Hello and thank you for reading my latest blog. despite not posting much recently that doesn’t mean i have been taking things easy..infact ive been very busy behind the scenes. although taking a short break from finishing my third novel i have been taking some time out to do some professional development, a refresher so to speak. I have been working through steps to raise my profile. You may have noticed that  the look of my website is different, this has been a big project and i can only exstend my sincere gratitude to everyone who has been helping me do this…you know who you are!

so what’s been happening? I am delighted to have been selected to participate in the first DIVA Literary Festival  taking place in Birmingham in November.I will be in the company of Literary royalty with fellow authors/writers such as Kiki Archer Val McDermid VG Lee and hot properties of the moment Helen Oakleigh Kate Bennett and a whole host of other amazing female writers.The event is being hosted by non other than Heather Peace…post twin births.The whole weekend promises to be a wonderful occasion and i am deeply honoured to be selected to participate so early into my career. I have applied to perform in the poetry platform at this’d years Lfest and i am waiting to find out if my application has been successful.

i have been dipping my toe into wider ponds and finding groups to join on social media.I recently joined an arts group based in scotland and i was delighted to participate in my first poetry open mic performance.This was a special victory as it was happening at a venue quite far away so i was unable to attend in person, but we were able to work together to arrange for me to perform via skype, demonstrating that more disabled performers can take part in events like this as long as the organisers are happy to think outside the box to make it money accessible.

i have begun a few new lifestyle rituals which have proved to be so useful to my working levels. I am able to write something however small every day i have increased the amount of poems i am writing a week and feel like i have found a real niche with my poetry.

i am hoping to secure a few more dates for appearances in the coming weeks and months and will let you all know as soon as i hear anything.

i feel like i have a renewed sence of energy to take things further so expect lots of news and activity online. With so many external influences affecting our sence of well being and so many political changes and unrest i leave you with this small thought, change is scary, but sometimes its so worth taking a leap of faith and go with it..to quote a line from a sweet kids moves used by the family of an adorable family who’s son is vey sick…keep swimming , the future is only  just beginning.